Shaken not stirred.

Ask   I'm Kristen. 24. Sex toy slinger, lush, excellent cook, quirkster, and all about animal welfare.

alex-of-macedonia:

theplanlaugh:

So my dad has this new idea: Take this wonderful wasabi thing

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Turn it into beautiful, small rectangles, wrap it in laminated paper and put it in a trident box, so that it’ll look like this:

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Give it to someone when they ask you for gum and watch as their mouth burns. Enjoy.

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(via universemystery)

— 1 day ago with 133896 notes
"I felt free and therefore I was free."
Jack Kerouac, The Dharma Bums (via throughtheopendoor)

(via ipetkitties)

— 1 day ago with 991 notes

talk-birdy-to-me:

very cute QUAIL making QUAIL NOISES

(via everyonelovesrobots)

— 1 day ago with 9168 notes
givemeinternet:

Do we all see these things?

givemeinternet:

Do we all see these things?

— 1 day ago with 506 notes

officialbeaubokan:

if you’re a girl & you say you’ve never been physically attracted to a girl you’re lying girls are fucking hot

(via ridiculouscurls)

— 2 days ago with 33027 notes
"Oh dear, what happened to your blinds?"

"Oh dear, what happened to your blinds?"

— 2 days ago with 2 notes

gaypee:

"i’m hungry"
"you just ate"
image

(via everyonelovesrobots)

— 2 days ago with 156893 notes
jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,  It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

jill-bird:

You see Spongebob,
It’s a metaphor. You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but never give it the power to kill you.

(via everyonelovesrobots)

— 2 days ago with 90299 notes